Confidence

Fake it til you make it: cOnFiDeNcE

I don't know a lot of girls who are born with natural confidence in themselves. Even the people who I once envied for their ability to walk, talk and breath "confidence" ultimately have turned out to be the most insecure of all. Never assess someone on the face that they front you with, for feigned self-confidence is an age-old trick.


I've never had a lot of self-confidence and it would be fair to say that I've underestimated myself for a good 20 years. I don't say this as a victim of any wrongdoing, but I always have claimed to be a realist keeping my feet on the ground and living life with realistic evaluations of myself and others. But I never really did this... looking back I was more pessimistic than realistic, always saying "I can't" because it was too uncomfortable, seemed too difficult or there was always someone else to compete with. I shied away from sports because it was too hard and too competitive, I found new social situations too uncomfortable, it took me years to discover my talents because it was too embarrassing and difficult to try new things in front of people. I always thought that beauty was equal to confidence and because there are so many girls in the world far more beautiful than I would ever be, then I could never truly be confident.

So many girls blame their self concept and self esteem issues on their past boyfriends, or males who have done the wrong thing by them. But in the end we determine our self-worth, not other people. It's actually ridiculous to blame other people for your issues, because no matter what circumstances confront us in life and what injustices we experience because of other people, we are always the ones who choose how it affects us.

It's taken me a long time to truly realize the meaning of embracing life. By no means am I someone who's up at the crack of dawn bungee jumping, surfing, running and hosting social events every other day, but I have realized in my own small way that being positive and being open to new opportunities brings on a whole world of possibilities. Simply saying "yes" even when you don't feel like it is enough to change your world. I can't believe how many opportunities I've encountered of late to meet beautiful people, experience nature at its best and truly laugh just by saying "Yea, I'll give that a go." Even if I fail, even if people hate me, even if I end up looking stupid, I'll give it a go because there is no point living my short life restricted by self-doubt and fear.

There's not many days I've had where I've thought "I'm good enough or smart enough or have achieved enough."
 I'll always be striving a little too hard to be better... But embracing opportunities to interact with people, to see new parts of the world and put my hand up to do even the smallest of things that make me uncomfortable has increased my self-confidence by a mile. When I throw myself into a situation that I'm not comfortable in, I fake it til I make it. Or in other words, I act confident and therefore slowly start to take on a confident persona. I may be doubting myself in my head over and over again, but when good things come of me saying yes, I've actually started to grow some real confidence from these outcomes.



If you put yourself out there you'll find that to those who matter you are intelligent, hilarious, worth building a friendship with, attractive and very dateable. And to God you are priceless. Just say yes!